


The Brave

by dolores



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: First Time, M/M, Nervousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-20
Updated: 2016-11-20
Packaged: 2018-09-01 02:39:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8603953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dolores/pseuds/dolores
Summary: Oz wasn't the only one to panic.





	

**Author's Note:**

> First posted in February 2004, for the Xanderslash ficathon. For saraslash.

It was Graduation Day. Larry had borrowed his mom's station wagon and before long it was full of library books and one Xander Harris.

Giles had been really quite flaky about the books. He'd insisted, over Buffy's objections that there was no time to be saving battered school texts, that they make time. He told her calmly that they may be about to destroy the school but there was no need to destroy the knowledge it held too. She'd rolled her eyes and said there wasn’t time for an argument either.

Xander was in the passenger seat, a carton of books on his lap and another between his feet on the floor. He was going to help Larry unload the car's contents when they reached Buffy's house. He'd grumbled that such a task was hardly the preserve of Key Guy, but when it was explained that the alternative was to help create fertiliser bombs he acquiesced.

They hadn't really spoken. Xander was avoiding conversation on account of the fact Larry might bring up that whole gay thing, and frankly Xander felt he had enough to deal with today.

So, it was Larry who spoke first.

"Hey, Harris?" Xander could barely hear Larry over the scratchy voice of Billie Holliday, who was trilling on the car stereo.

"Huh?"

"All this stuff with the Mayor? It's like The Big One, isn't it? This is where Sunnydale disappears into a hole."

"More like everybody becomes an Oreo cookie for a great big snake demon, but yeah, it's all bad."

Larry nodded and lapsed into silence again. For a moment.

"Harris? Are you scared?"

Xander shifted in his seat. Discussing emotions with Larry was dangerously close to discussing gay stuff. Which, as previously mentioned, wasn't happening today. Maybe it was best to be macho.

"No, I'm not scared. We've killed way worse than him. You?"

Larry laughed, but in a hollow way that didn't sound happy. "I'm fucking terrified. I keep thinking: shit, I'm gonna die. I mean, hell, it's probably only luck I got this far, considering how many of the rest of the team bit it over the years."

This was slightly disconcerting. Even the new, sensitive Larry had never been anything less than brashly confident. "Hey, Larry. Try not to worry. We got Buffy on our side, and everyone at school's gonna help out. We'll lick his scaly ass."

"But what if we don't? What if this is our last day on Earth? I wanted to do so many things…"

Xander might have reached over to pat Larry's thigh in a comforting manner – but no. "Don't talk like that. You gotta have a PMA."

"Like what chicks get?"

"No! Positive Mental Attitude."

Larry nodded, but he didn't seem convinced. There was another silence, during which Larry's fingers flexed on the steering wheel. Xander had the feeling he was building up to something, and this was confirmed when Larry suddenly blurted out, "It's just – I – I haven’t done it. I might die and I haven't done it. Jeez, Harris, what is it with me always telling you my secrets?"

Xander knew he knew the answer to the next natural question but some masochistic part of him asked it anyway. "Done what?"

"You know. It."

"I thought you said your grandmother…"

"I know what I said."

"Oh." Wait, we're not discussing this today. Deal with it, move on, change the subject. "Don't worry. You'll survive, then you have your football scholarship to UCLA and there's all those frat hazing ceremonies – I've heard the rumours, they sound like they're totally your thing, and anyway, did you see that news report about the…"

"I've never even been on a date. I'm Big Gay Larry and it's all talk. You know, it's stupid. I came out and the team were all fine, eventually, but I still had to be the stud. It was all, 'hey, Larry, get some dick this weekend?' in the locker room and there was just as much pressure as before. And I lied, just like before."

They pulled up on Revello. Xander really didn't know what to say. So he got out of the car and started to carry the carton up the path. Larry sat there for a moment, then followed.

Joyce was out of town, sent away by Buffy, and the house was deserted. Xander had Buffy's keys and let himself in. They moved the majority of the cartons into the living room, hardly saying a word.

It was Larry who broke the silence again, catching Xander's arm in the hallway, a slightly wild look in his eyes.

"Harris?"

Xander looked at Larry, suddenly more scared.

"What?"

Larry lunged in and tried to kiss Xander, who pulled his head back to avoid it.

"Larry! I'm not gay!"

Larry released his arm. "You are." He sounded hurt.

"Am not! That was all a misunderstanding."

"Aw, come on, Harris! Don’t give me that bull. We don't have time for all this closet shit. You can’t tell me you're one hundred per cent straight."

Xander opened his mouth to do just that, but then found that he actually couldn't.

Larry pleaded. "Look, please. I know I'm not the best looking guy at school and I'd really rather my first time was a little more romantic. But we could die today, never knowing what it's like. You don't want to go still a virgin, do you?"

Xander wanted to say that that wasn't an issue, but he didn't.

"And if, y'know, we do anything and we both survive, I won't tell anybody. I promise. You can stay in the closet as long as you need to."

They stood there for a few seconds, and when Xander said nothing, Larry moved his head to Xander's own.

Xander didn't pull away.

Larry was surprisingly gentle when he kissed Xander, and the hand he placed on Xander's shoulder trembled. It was different from Cordy, different from Faith, scratchy but not unpleasant.

They moved through to the living room, with cartons of books on every surface, and Larry carefully undressed Xander, who surprised himself by letting him. On completion, Larry whistled once, low, and Xander went pink. Then, Larry peeled off his own clothes. He was chunky and broad, muscled for sure, but carrying a little weight too. Not gorgeous, but still kinda sexy.

Xander registered that he had just thought that thought and decided maybe today was as good a day as any to deal.

In the event, it was kinda fumbly for the most part and they only used their hands and some hand lotion Joyce had left on the coffee table – but in Xander's limited experience it was the best sex he'd ever had. At the very least, his partner gave some attention to his needs as well as their own.

They lay on the carpet afterwards, embraced, kissing without tongues, and suddenly Larry rolled onto his back and burst into laughter. Great guffaws of mirth.

Paranoia set in immediately. "What'd I do?!"

"Nothing. Everything. I did it! I finally did it with a guy and, hey, it was kinda sweet. I can die now."

"I keep telling you! We're not going to die."

Larry chuckled and then punched him on the bicep. It hurt. "You're a brave son of a bitch, Harris."

Xander shrugged, sheepish. "So are you, Larry. Ready to fight?"

"Yeah."


End file.
